Everything happens for a reason...sometimes that reason is a reminder that some things never change.

"I guess I'll see you next lifetime."

I wish you didn't cross my mind the way that you do,
I wish time stood a little stiller when I was with you,
I wish I didn't have this emptiness without you,
I wish you could see you the way that I do,
Even though your vision of me probably isn't as true,
They say, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" and my hands couldn't be more full,
The intensity of this weight is bringing me to the ground,
And the only thing making me nervous is if I fall you won't be around.

I'm really not into materialistic possessions. I live for experience... culture... stimulation... art... nature (minus spiders)... the ability to say, "I've been there. I've devoured that. I've witnessed it's beauty. I've felt it's spirit. My heart has skipped those beats. I've captured it's essence."

12.29.13

I just want to be understood,
My mind travels in dusk,
Thoughts filled of uncertainties,
Tongue sits confused without purpose,
Hearing whispers,
"Keep your thoughts, no one cares."
Tears fill my eyes,
And I don't fucking know why,
Melancholy.

Fine.

Fine lines,
Perforated edges,
Mix matched fabrics,
Organized expectations.
Boldness tracing the pout of your lips,
Deceit spilling thru your finger tips,
Conjured thoughts without emotion,
Substance lacking depth,
Treading between fantasy and reality,
Everything I knew missed footnotes,
Everything I heard missed conviction,
Everything I felt missed yearning,
Everything I thought missed structure.
Organized expectations,
Mix matched fabrics,
Perforated edges.
Were the lines a fixation of my imagination?
Everything I thought missed structure.
Everything I felt missed yearning.
Everything I heard missed conviction.
Everything I knew missed footnotes.
You were the woman I dreamed about,
Now I question the validity of my subconscious.

[Written 6.23.14]