I want a tattoo. Ok, I want 5 tattoos. I'm ready for my hair to flourish and for my sides to grow back in. At the same time I kind of like my sides being low. I do not miss my hair tickling the fuck out of my ears. I miss having someone to cuddle with. I miss intimacy. I miss someone looking in my eyes and their eyes lighting up slightly simply because I was their view. I want more stamps in my passport. I want to have a baby. Yes, actually carry a baby in my little stomach and feel him/her/they kick. It's crazy thinking how different my reality in 2019 actually is vs what I had envisioned. I used to get upset or slightly down when I thought about my ex but now when she crosses my mind I smile and tell myself that, "Sometimes things end to make room for something better." The issue with that thinking of course is for the longest, I didn't want anyone else. I am content single but I would like to be loved on a deeper level. I'm more sensitive than I present. Sometimes I'm so in my thoughts and or feelings that I cannot share them with anyone. I kind of want that to change. It's a level of vulnerability that I cannot foresee allowing just anyone to witness however. There is this strange liquid substance wanting to escape my eyes. Yeah, a tattoo today would be nice I don't think it's going to happen. I should find an artist in this city. Debating whether I want to knock a few miles off of this load today or just crank them out in the wee hours to make my 0800 appointment. I do like driving but sometimes I crave more freedom. I need to hop on a few planes. My wanderlust seems insatiable. I definitely need to get outside today.